Dani speak

Almost 2 years old, my daughter has become a comedian in her own right. She has personality that would make her great grandfather, Gabriel proud.  Its kinda in the blood.  Especially on my side!

But she is funniest when she seems to have a language all on her own.  The listener should actually be around her often to actually get her train of thought.  She is quick as a whip.

Just the other day while she was playing with her blocks and other knick knacks she was able to get her hands on, she noticed laga-lagas (insects that come out when its about to rain) flying and crawling on her bedroom floor.  So I indulged her curiosity by playing with the insects and showing her how it would react with my fingers.  I don't want Dani to be scared of insects and lizards.  I try to hide my own fears (well, mainly of cockroaches.  Lizards I'm fine with).

Her curiosity was so interesting to watch.  She would giggle and try to imitate what I was doing.  The insect crawled into one of the shoe boxes she was playing with so it became sort of a little hide and seek moment.  All of sudden she brings the box to her eye level and says "Laga-lagaaaah!  Weh awr yooouuu? (Laga-laga!  Where are you?)  I was so surprised!  She could actually do full sentences now and that just make me so giddy.  Its still new for all of us so the proud mommy in me has had a lot of pats on the back.

My husband scolded her the other day because she was being a bit rowdy at the dinner table.  She sat still and had her head down, lips pouting a bit.  She was like that for about 2 minutes.  Then all of a sudden she lifted her head, gave Bryan the sweetest smile and said "I love you, Daddy!  I love you!"  Hows that for reverse psychology!  That her way of making up with you.  She does know she can't get away with it even then but her effort is appreciated and we just explain to her more.

Parenting is such a ride.  We are barely 2 years in and I feel like I've learned a masters degree in baby speak.  God knows how different the toddler years are going to be!  But thank you, Lord, for every day we get to learn from each other!

Halfway there!

5 days down,  5 more days to go until I get to pinch these yummy cheeks.  My baby's not the yaya's (haha!).

I miss taking her out on our little adventures.  These are the simple things we do that doesn't need an explanation (or blog entry for that matter).  But I just really miss it and I think my withdrawals are getting worse by the day.  Sigh!

But I am still very thankful for all this time to reflect and realign.  That last part makes me sound like a truck.  Hmmm...  So thank you, Lord!

3 down, 7 to go

It finally rained today.  The hot days have been coming in and out and it seemed no break was in sight.  This summer has been very intense and the little signs of rain finally came through.  The lagalaga (insects that come out before it rains, typical of our part of the world), rumbling thunder in the distance.  The air has gotten cooler and everyone is less on edge and gotten mellow.

I have always loved the rain.  But lately my days have gotten so hectic that I've begun to think the way others have, seeing it as hindrance to my schedule.  But now that I am literally forced to keep still in one place, I see something I once loved.  How everything is covered in a cozy cloudy blanket, the beating of the rain overhead, how everything becomes more quiet and you can hear things from a distance.

Last week when I was back home for a while, I could feel my heart ache a little bit as I drove around.  Seeing the familiar sights I used to see in bright orange from the sunset, kids running and playing in the beach.  The roads are not as congested as Iloilo so the little tricycles here in there just adds to the feeling of being home.

Now with the rain, it brings me back to the days when I used to just look out of my window and see the rain just falling outside.  How the bamboo leaves would sway and the smell of wet grass.  I would do that for hours on end.  With a book in some times.  Life was simpler.

No matter how bad I felt, I always felt a sense of comfort whenever it rained.  It just calmed me and my fears.  Even in my dreams, the ones that are the most vivid, it seems to be raining or cloudy.  Now I don't know about other people's dreams, but that just seems to be the ongoing theme in mine.

So for my third day,  I choose to see it as a blessing and a gift.  I rarely have these moments and I just realized I don't want to be part of the rushing blur.  I want to savor each moment.  I want Dani to be the same way.  To see beauty in the simple things.  Drops of rain.  The gentle rumble of thunder. The quiet but stunning sunsets.  BIrds flying back home at the end of a long hot day. Dew on grass in the mornings.  Full moons at night.

It surprises me how some people just live right through it.  Everything is so photoshopped and altered.  I like to remember things as they really are.  Most importantly, I want to remember the feeling of that moment.  It may not resonate with other people, but I like recalling how it moved me in some way.  Call me sentimental.  Call me dramatic.  But I refuse to live a life numb and not seeing how beautiful my God is.  He is much too good for that and He has been overlooked too many times.

Thank you, Lord for this day.  For this time of reflection, quiet and stillness.

10 days and counting...

Today is only my second day of self quarantine after finding out I have sore eyes and another kind of virus in my left eye.  According to the doctor I am contagious so I should be careful in what and whom I come in contact with.  That includes my baby girl.

The isolation in itself is not so bad.  Its being away from Dani that hurts.  When the doctor mentioned 10 days away from her, I was holding back my tears.  That was not what I had in mind.  

So now I talk and watch Dani eat her breakfast through the glass door.  She keeps calling me and wanting me to hold and carry her.  "Mommy!  Mommy!"  I get tears in my eyes each time.  I have to tell her I'm sick.  She can say the word sick but has no idea what that means as of yet.

This morning, while she was having her breakfast she quickly jumped off her seat and tried to open the glass door.  She was pushing and pulling as hard as she could.  All I could do was sit there and try to cheer her up.  This is the hardest part.

I also get to watch her through the video camera Bryan installed in her room.  But it only makes my heart ache even more.

Counting the days, hours and minutes until I'm out and she is the first one I'm going to.

 

In a time of need

Psalms 91:14-16
“Because he loves me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him;
I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
He will call on me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble,
I will deliver him and honor him.
With long life I will satisfy him
and show him my salvation.”

Holy Week in Boracay

This was a holiday of firsts.  First time with Dani in Boracay and 1st time I am anywhere outside of home on Holy Week.

Bryan really exceeded our expectations and booked us in a great hotel with Dani's most favorite thing/past time in plain sight: a swimming pool.  And to top it another notch, a bath tub, which Dani also thinks is a swimming pool.  So this was an awesome place to be!

The trip itself was a nightmare of sorts.  With Dani's motion sickness rearing its very ugly head.  She threw up in the car over me and her dad.  3 times.  Poor girl.

Good thing the stop at Latte in Kalibo helped her take the final hour of travel left easier.  She loved the adobo, too.  

This is also Bryan and Dani's first trip out together.  Love how they got to bond over so many new moments that only a father and daughter could have.

We had a very blessed trip with the sun shining the whole time!  God is good!  Seemed like everyone we knew was also in Boracay.  Even Ptr. Tanchi's family from Manila also happened to be there.

Boracay Garden, formerly Seraph Hotel, was recently acquired by the same group of people involved in Boracay Regency.  They fixed up the place and are still continuing to give it more exciting new structures and additions.

On the way to the island, we had the speed boat all to ourselves.  Dani was a bit puzzled since she was asleep when we boarded the boat.  She looked around with big eyes and finally exclaimed, "Wow!"

 But when we finally got to our room.  She was obviously happy to see the tub.  She insisted on getting in and trying it out.  I think her smile shows everything.

The pool access was a brilliant move by my husband.  That was the highlight of the whole trip for Dani.  Papa is king.  

Boracay is not only known for its white sand, but for its sunsets.  To have that moment with my Dani and Bryan, something I will cherish for the rest of my life.  This was our first sunset together.  God is so good.  Some people walk past this all their life, but so few ever get to experience this.  We are so blessed.  Some actually choose to sleep through it.  It didn't matter if there were hundreds of people walking around.  The two most important people in my life were with me that very instant.  Yes, I am very sentimental.  But wouldn't this picture be worth carrying with you for the rest of your life?  Money could never buy this.  You couldn't stage it even if you tried.

Holy Week is mainly a reminder of the ultimate love that gave us the ultimate sacrifice that would become our ultimate triumph.  In God's eyes we were made new by Jesus' blood.  Who said you couldn't meditate in Boracay?

Its all a matter of choice.  Sometimes the temptations of the world overwhelms us.  Its easier to go with the crowd.  Its harder for some people to just keep still and let God do the talking for a change.

The trip with my family was not 100% mishap proof.  It wasn't the breeziest.  But it taught me a lot about my daughter, husband, other people and myself.  We needed this trip as a family.  

Looking at Dani, my perception of love is renewed each day.  Its only now that I get to experience facets of the kind of love God has for us.  Its happy and scary at the same time at how much and how big it can be.